The Lounge of the Adventurer – lots of randomness with sprinkles made of comedy and a filling of our finest quality spite

Recorded for posterity

Posted on: 6 June 2008

Me:
So, Elodie and I were just sitting upstairs playing Rock Band, and we looked at the clock. She said that I had to get over to see you guys sometime, so we might as well get started now. So we just went upstairs to her bathroom together, where she had everything set up already.

Kyle: Wait. What. Set up already? Huh!?

Me:
Don’t interrupt my story, dammit! Anyways, she had everything set up already and, well… one thing after another, there we were right next to each other, trying not to panic. After calming her down a bit and assuring her that everything was going to be okay, we got started. Actually, it wasn’t her first time, amazingly enough–

Kyle: WAIT WHAT!?

Me:
Shut the hell up! It wasn’t her first time, her third and fourth, actually. Dunno where she did the first two… the marks were obvi–

Kyle: MARKS?!

Me:
Shut up! Anyways! Well, there we were. Breathing heavily, ready to go, you know the rest. I put it right next to here I was going to enter, and asked her. “Are you ready?” She said “yeah.” I asked her just to breathe slowly and carefully and not to panic as it went in.

Kyle: O__O

Me:
I know, right? It gets better. I told her with a countdown, one-two-three, that we were about to go. So.. I just put it in and through. Nicely and carefully, slowly. It went in easier than I thought, actually, so it was all good.

Kyle: …WOW

Me:
I know, right? I just that damn awesome. Anyways, after a bit of moaning and pain and all, we finished, cleaned up. That’s it! That’s the end of my story.

Kyle: …so how was it? Having sex with Elodie?

Me:
…Having sex with her!? I was only piercing her ears! What the hell kind of mind do you have!?

Everybody: ROFLOLOLOLOL BEST STORY EVER etc. etc. etc.

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ABOUT THE HAWKING CHILD

My name is Daniel Hawking.

There are three fractions that make up this persona.

One of which is sealed closed via the physical realm of the world. One of which is unlocked via the medium known as the Internet. One of which is standing tall, watching over the wondrous horizon in front of him.

Of the first, this is the one most who have met me see, the one shunned, the one unappreciated, the one treated as entertainment instead of a colleague, the one shunted off to the side.

Of the second, only a select few have been able to meet. Coherency and truthful thoughts are the hallmarks of those knowing this fraction, as are trust and belief. Most of the dearest friends know of this section.

Of the third...? Revival of the finest order, as the phoenix of a prince rises from his own ashes. The adventurer, a traveler.

Regardless of fates, this is who I am now.

Daniel Hawking. Prince of Aralonia.

One of many.

A representative of Aralonia.

Together, the collective mindset of a nation.

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